Don't worry, I'm not hearing voices. Just laughing...I hope.
I'm working on some stand-up? A speech? Not sure what to call it.
I've been asked to emcee our women's Christmas banquet through our church. It's two nights, about 300 women each night at a banquet hall with a formal dinner and entertainment and message. I'm sort of the non-lesbian Ellen Degeneres of the evening...although I won't be dancing...I would like to actually, but there will be a lot of white hair in the crowd that would probably have no idea what I am doing!
So I'm working on my intro and standing in the kitchen pretending I'm in front of a mic in front of 300 naked women...actually that doesn't help my nerves...who thought of that technique? Obviously a man! I think the things I'm saying will get a laugh, in fact...I'm even optimistic and working on pausing at certain sections while the roar of the crowd dissipates so they don't miss my next hilarious comment. But seriously, what if they all just look at me? I've watched a lot of stand up comics put out a joke to receive nothing in return. You know that wasn't how they envisioned it when they were rehearsing! I wondering if I could ask the woman in charge of women's ministries if it would be inappropriate to have her stand on stage right with a giant cue card that says "APPLAUSE" to hold up on occasion. Perhaps a little tacky.
I know I am just the foot, heck, the toe in the entire evenings agenda (some of you may get that "body of Christ" analogy) but seriously, hang nails can really hurt and become completely distracting! I want to be a great pedicure that makes the women feel good about the whole evening and enhances the entire production.
Hopefully I can be affective feet, and the music can be affective hands, and the fellowship can be an affective body, and then the message can reach and effect the women that will be attending.
The Air(brush)ing Of Grievances
14 hours ago
7 comments:
I wish I could be there to appropriately laugh at your jokes. I have often thought your humor reminded me of Ellen, but I don't think I ever told you that. I wish you the best!
JayLynn
I always tell people the exact same thing-thinking of everyone naked does not help at ALL! It's a surefire way to get distracted or nauseous (depending on your audience). My advice? Envision everyone there MORE fully clothed! Pulling for you-
You will be fabulous! Is anyone going to videotape you? You are amazing! Have fun with it!
I think this is an awesome job for you! You'll be great. And, if you say something and people don't laugh, I'm sure you'll come up with something else to make that funny. You're one of the funniest females I know. I'm sure that this gift (God is obviously wanting to use in you), He will enable in unexpected ways that night. Plan what you can plan, of course, and then trust God for the rest!
You are funniest person I know. You will do great... wish I could be there!
So use us...tape some of your "bits" and we'll play Paula, Randy, and Simon. Can I be Paula? I'll go get the Tequila.
Good Luck!
Lisa ;)
What fun, I'm sure you will be great. I have done stuff like that, and it's quite an experience, and even with the slightly lame jokes, there was laughter. :)
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