Organized Chaos

I'm still consumed with thoughts of the Pedersen family. Every two year old boy I see makes me think of Lucas. Every Volvo XC 90 makes me think of the crash pictures. Every red head little girl makes me think of Ashley. Every father/daughter I see holding hands makes me think of Jim.

On Monday, while many of us are enjoying the 3 day weekend with our families, there will be a memorial service for Carrie and Lucas at their church in Little Rock. The people that were a part of their daily lives during this assignment will have the opportunity to pay their respects and say their good-byes. The neighbors that played with their kids. The babysitters. The co-workers. The friends.

Despite the turbulence I still feel within my soul and brain on a moment by moment basis...I've also seen and experienced God at work in the midst of this storm. I've been receiving emails from strangers across the country. Strangers united by the thread of friendship found in Carrie at some point in their lives. Strangers who have expressed to me how God is using this situation to draw them closer to Him despite the troubling circumstances.

While you've been reading this you've been listening to "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns on my playlist. I was just mopping the floor when this song started playing and it immediately make me think of the Pederson family. I remember crying when I heard this song on the way home from dropping Brad off for his 120 day deployment. I thought of this same song in light of the death of Carrie and Lucas and it gave me perspective on all the things we'll consider storms in our lives. In reality, our storms are so often just cloudy days that we stress over or exaggerate in terms of their significance. I pray to God that when and if you face a true storm you are still able to experience the grace of God and praise Him in the storm.